Dedicated To The Innocent Terror-Victims Of Mumbai , India
Written By: Dovid Nissan Roetter
What exactly is ‘Mesiras Nefesh’?
I know ‘Sacrificing Your Life for Hashem’. But what does it really mean ‘giving
up your life’? I’m only a 14 year-old boy, born in 1994. Thank G-d I wasn’t
alive in the times of the Crusades or the infamous Holocaust. So I can’t understand as well what Mesiras
Nefesh really is. Unfortunately, in view of the recent events, I think I now
know what it means. Now, I never personally knew the Holtzbergs, like my sister
Pesha Leah did. But, yet, it all affected me very deeply. I guess it’s because
we are all brothers and sisters. I guess everyone had some Mesiras Nefesh when
they heard the news. So, really, Mesiras Nefesh is not just giving up your
physical bodies for Hashem, like Rabbi Gavriel and Rivkie did. Also, to a
certain extent, giving up your emotional body, as well as your desires, I guess.
That is also true Mesiras Nefesh. That is living for Hashem!
As I mentioned earlier, my sister
Pesha Leah Azoulay, knew the Holtzbergs HY”D. Below is a poem dedicated to
their memory.
Written By: Pesha Leah Azoulay of the OK Kosher
I never knew where Mumbai was.
I never knew.
That all changed.
Three months ago, when I started working.
Planning a trip with all its details.
For a Rabbi to go to India
To perform kashrus inspections.
We worked on this trip.
All of the details.
Together with Rabbi Holtzberg.
Who would be accompanying.
Rabbi Holtzberg, when I spoke to you on
Tuesday,
You were so accommodating.
“I would never want to be a stranded Jew in India
Those were your words.
And you insisted we change the schedule,
So the Rabbi could stay by you, one more
night.
So you can help him out even more.
Rabbi Holtzberg, when I spoke with you on
Tuesday,
I had assumed you were much older.
You spoke with such a depth, such ahavas
Yisroel.
On Wednesday, we had finalized the details.
I just was working with the companies,
Waiting for confirmations regarding
transport.
On Wednesday night, my husband delicately
mentions,
“Were you planning a trip to India
I don’t think that is a very good idea,
There are terrorist attacks.”
But more details he didn’t give.
And I just couldn’t ask.
Thursday morning, in my inbox.
An email from a company.
They can not get through to you.
They are worried you might be involved.
I had to inform all of them,
Yes, this is our Rabbi.
That’s when it started to hit home.
I followed the news all day.
Hoping, praying, begging.
In a daze, terrified but hoping for the best.
Saying tehillim.
Asking women to bake challah. Please, bake
challah with a bracha.
As a segulah for a yeshua.
Thursday night,
My friends get together,
We are saying tehillim,
All of us, together, out loud.
On Friday, things aren’t getting better.
Conflicting reports all day long.
I glance up at my computer screen.
A note, I hadn’t noticed it before.
PLEASE CALL HOLTZBERG.
A smaller note next to it reminds me
Call holtzberg.
My blood freezes. It feels like ages ago
These are just from Tuesday.
Tuesday, when I spoke to you.
I am begging Hashem,
“Bring them back to us.
Alive and well!”
The tears are streaming down my face,
My wrenching sobs shaking me,
To my very core.
I grab my tehillim and storm the heavens.
Crying, praying and hoping.
I refuse to accept any reports.
I simply can’t.
A young shliach in his prime.
Whom I had just spoken with,
The day before these horrible events.
No, it can’t be.
Hashem, it’s enough!
AD MOSAI? TILL WHEN?
Rabbi Holtzberg always made sure
No one would be stranded,
Aibeshter, Oy Aibeshter,
Don't let your children remain stranded!
Bring the Geulah now!
Living With Mesiras Nefesh
If I would ask you what Mesiras
Nefesh means, you’d probably say ‘giving up your life for Hashem’. Right? Well
you are right, but it’s really more than that. Mesiras Nefesh can also mean
giving up your desires. What do I mean, you ask? Well, if for example, you want
to oh… go to a basketball game. But you know it’s wrong. Yet you really want to
go. What can you do? You could, maybe, leave early, or go outside and learn
during the halftime, or whatever. That’s also Mesiras Nefesh. You’re
sacrificing your desires.
There once was a sheperd, who
also had Mesiras Nefesh, in this aspect. His name was Akiva. One day, he saw a
rock that had a hole drilled into it. When he enquired about it, he was told
that the water dripping on it, made a hole. If water can penetrate a rock, he
thought to himself. Why can’t torah penetrate my head? So giving up all worldly
desires, he then studied torah, became Rabbi Akiva, and had many students. That
was also Mesiras Nefesh.
Physically Mesiras Nefesh
As
everyone knows, Mesiras Nefesh means giving up your life for Hashem, literally.
Like the Kedoshim in Mumbai did. Unfortunately, there were many other times in
our history, where people gave up their lives. For example, the infamous
holocaust. Millions of Jews were killed, in order to sanctify the name of
Hashem. They were Mesiras Nefesh with their complete physical body.
There is one time in history
though, that I want to talk about. This is the story of The Ten Martyrs (The עשרה הרוגי מלכות).
The day the Bais Hamikdosh was
destroyed, the first one was killed. His name was Rabbi Shimon ben Gamliel. He
was the father of Rabbi Yehudah the Nosi (prince). Later, Rabbi Yishmoel ben
Elisha, the Cohen Gadol (the High Priest). Sixty years following the
destruction, Rabbi Akiva, the same one I talked about earlier, was killed. His
was the worst. The Romans tore off his skin with tons of iron combs. Thirteen
years passed. The other seven, were then killed in horrible ways. Some were burnt
alive; some had their tongue cut off, while one was stabbed with 300 iron
laces. Their names were: Rabbi Yehudah ben Bava, Rabbi Chanina ben Tradion,
Rabbi Yeshavav the sofer (scribe), and Rabbi Elazar ben Dama. There was also,
Rabbi Chanina ben Chakinai, and Rabbi Chutzpith the Translator. Last of all,
Rabbi Elazar ben Shamua. He was the greatest genius of his time. He also bor
the title ‘Best of the Sages’. Rabbi Yehudah the Nosi was his student.
Now, some, replace Rabbi Chanina
ben Chakinai, Rabbi Elazar ben Dama, and Rabbi Elazar ben Shamua with Rabbi
Yehudah the Baker, Ben Azzai, and Rabbi Tarfon. But, the first opinion is more
reasonable. That is the story of the Ten Martyrs.
So now, hopefully, all of us,
including myself, understand a bit more about Mesiras Nefesh, and what it means
to us as Jews. Just like ה' avenged the blood of the Ten Martyrs, so
too, He will avenge the blood of Rabbi Gavriel and Rivkie, along with the other
innocent terror victims of Mumbai. There are many things being done in honor of
the Kedoshim, including ‘Mitzvos for Mumbai’.
I hope that by writing this essay, I too have fulfilled a portion in
this mitzvah.
